Jekyll Island Beach 2012

Jekyll Island Beach 2012

Sunday, April 18, 2010

A SECRET LIFE EXPOSED!!


The Rogues Speak:

Whenever the Guild has exhibits, there is always a book of bios of the participating artists, so the patrons can read about their favorites. The following is all about the art life of my Best Friend Artist. If she one day updates this bio, I will print it, and everyone will know about all the wild, illegal, and dangerous stuff in which she has involved me over the years. Enjoy:


D i a n e L o v i n g

artladyloving@comcast.net

Born the illegitimate daughter of Pablo Picasso and his eighty-fourth mistress, Diane Loving was forced to flee Paris after what has been called internationally “L’Incident du Louvre,” where she insisted upon “prettifying” her father’s works by cutting out facial features on his portraits and pasting them back on…properly. I mean, whoever heard of some lady having 2 eyes on one side of her upside down nose ?

Diane lived briefly in New York until the fateful night of the “Warhol Incident,” when she took a can opener to several of Andy’s famous Campbell Soup silkscreens. Though she was hailed by some critics, several members of Warhol’s Factory bought her a one-way ticket to Los Angeles where she thrived designing masterpieces sprayed onto buildings in the dead of night. This became known as the “Spray Paint Incident,” if only in Diane’s own head. She escaped to Tucson 2 steps ahead of the law.

The colors of the desert inspired Diane to paint canvases in beige, ecru, eggshell, brown, tan and dirt tones. She fought this inspiration however, and settled for exploring the intricacies of filigree with pen and black ink.

Diane’s works can be seen locally in galleries in Tucson and Tubac, and someday her works may re-appear in Italy, if the Vatican Council ever issues a pardon for the “Sistine Chapel Ceiling Incident.”

21 comments:

Anonymous said...

That was really fantastically funny!

art4allofu said...

she must have written that bio immediately after finishing that tasteful vat o' booze.

Judie said...

Thank you, Girl Next Door, and thank you, "Mysterious Woman who left a comment!" I am very lucky to have such a friend with whom to do horribly funny and dangerous things. Just so you both know, she MAKES me do those things--I am too chicken to do them on my own, because SHE lives a charmed life, and I would most certainly get caught and jailed.

Anonymous said...

I hope you are not the woman I saw breaking and entering, once! You are luck that you can run so fast or you really would be in jail now!

The Guy's Perspective said...

That is pretty funny! I can only imagine the adventures you might be having together. Let's keep it that way, otherwise I'll also be an accomplice.

Judie said...

Pal, you have NO idea! This woman has NO FEAR!
I just finished posting more photos of my clay pieces, so check back. I also went to your friend's website. I love his work! SOOOOO much better than blue stars!

nothingprofound said...

I lived in Tucson many years, and had the honor to see your friend in action. I still have the scar over my left eye. She called it abstract art, I called it assault and battery.

The Guy's Perspective said...

Where are your pieces? The Raku pots?

I love the first one, "not for sale" and the one with the deer antler. Very cool stuff!

Who is Joanne Hungate? For the longest time I thought it was you.

Judie said...

Both of those pieces are raku. The smaller of the two has a strip of glaze just under the rim, and I had burnished the clay before it was fired--that gives it the smooth look. You probably were looking for pieces with color and metallic flashes. I have done some, but the smoke is very toxic. I will probably get some strange lung disease from breathing it in without a face mask for so long.

JoAnne is a Guild member whose work I admire. I especially like the assemblage pieces. Wish I could afford one!

Judie said...

Nothingprofound, Shakespeare said, "Brevity is the soul of wit." Love your blog! So you have a scar? What did she hit you with? An art history text book? You must have been a pretty rowdy student!

Story Collector said...

What did she do in the Sistine Chapel? Paint herself standing next to Adam and Eve?

Anonymous said...

Judie! I am such a dork. I replied to your comments and just realized that you have the "no reply" feature turned off!!

SO.... I love the aging hooker comment! My mom has been dying her hair for YEARS! Then she had a stroke at the dentist from being in the chair too long and bent back and it cut the blood supply off. I know. YUCK. It was a fluke, but since then she won't tip her head back even to go get her hair done. I am her beautician now (heaven help her) and she has let it go gray, but the new food coloring makes it all fun.

Judie said...

My mother and sister were so vain that they would not go out of the house without a dye job! I have been going gray since I was in my 20's. I might spray some neon colors on my hair, but what you see is what you get. I did put temporary color on my hair once for a 60's party. It was rather frightening, so I frantically tried to wash it out.
I don't mind looking my age, as long as I can act as young as I feel.

Joann Mannix said...

Judie,

Man, I want to be friends with you and your girl, there. I'm pretty sure we could light up a town, even prettier than those desert sunsets!

And like my friend, Laura of The Girl Next Door, I too have been politely answering your comments until I realized you had the no reply comment on. And my question is, where do those no reply comments go? Because, they don't come back to me.

Anyway, to answer your question, on my blog, the feed is your RSS feed or your subscription feed. I use feedburner feed. It's very easy to setup on your blog. A feed is important if you want to reach as many people as possible with your blog. Some People use a feed to get notified of your new posts. It also keeps Google and other search engines current on your posts. A feed also helps you keep track of how many readers you have and where they're all coming from. It's a handy little thing, until it breaks down.

Judie said...

Dear Joann,

Blah, blah, blah, blah! I have had the day from hell and haven't a clue as to just what you are saying. It might make sense after I have had some sleep, after I get the ODOR of the perfume bottle that I broke at 2 fucking o'clock in the morning when my dog Precious crowded me out of the bed and my pillow hit my night stand, aka my make-up table and the perfume broke all over the tile floor. Rod left to sleep on the sofa and I lay awake cursing the Gods that I did not get a sub for bridge last night.

After reading your blog, I KNOW that we would be great friends!

My girl has saved my life more times than I am willing to admit. Despite the fact that she is crazier than anyone I know, she is the compass by which I steer my ship.

I am heading to Atlanta after the 10th of May. Are you close by?

Joann Mannix said...

Judie,

That's just a crapload of bad about your dressing table. Sorry. Hope it wasn't something outrageously expensive and French.

And I wish! I'm not even close to Atlanta. I live near Tampa and I'm about 8 hours from that great city. It would have been nice.

Joann Mannix said...

Oh, and if you decide to champion Feedburner, let me know. I have an easy tutelage you can use.

Judie said...

You're near Tampa??? Can I come live with you???

Judie said...

I received this from a very dear artist friend, Cherrie Lucern-Martin:

"Now I understand why the CIA arrived at my door asking if I knew the woman and her whereabouts. Naturally, I denied her very existence.

I wonder if her "Warhol Incident" was at approximately the same time as my "Warhol Incident" in Denver. Hmmmm. All I did was touch the damned soup can and they threw me out of the museum. They probably thought it was HER again.

You call her work filigree. I have seen some of it and it is purely lascivious.

I can only hope the Vatican's Carabinieri won't connect me with her as I plan to visit the Sistine Chapel next year and do not want to be barred from the premises for nothing more than guilt by association."

art4allofu said...

When you go to the Vatican, I recommend borrowing a ladder from the janitor (in Italian I believe that is "Janitortinateloni.") Get up close and personal with that ceiling...you can't see the detail in all that genitalia from 70 feet below it!

Judie said...

Did you really sign your own name on that ceiling?