Ready! Aim! Fire!!

The Rogue Speaks:

Rod and I decided to do our New Year's Eve thing last night, and avoid the rush. First we went to see "War Horse." I thought HE was the one who wanted to see it, because he mentioned that he wanted us to go to a movie, and the only one he recognized from the ads was that one. I wanted to see something else, but decided to acquiesce. Turns out, he DIDN'T want to see it, but thought I DID! It was horribly depressing and bloody, with horses and men getting killed and tortured in WWI. I was glad when it was over! Then we had a gift card to a local restaurant (actually we had TWO to that restaurant), and went there, only to find out that the place had changed hands and the card was no good. But it WAS good at another restaurant, so we went there! He gave the waitress the card, and lo and behold, the balance on the card was ZERO! We had used one of the two cards a while back, and he accidentally threw the good one ($50) away! We ate there anyway, and it was very good!

So tonight, the real New Year's Eve, he is planning on watching football, and I am going to "Girls' Game Night" at the home of my BFA. I gave her a new game for Christmas, "Truth or Crap," and we plan to try it out while eating fondue. Our game nights get rather wild, and I will have a report for you, replete with photos!

Now, on to my Saturday Centus! The prompt is in bold type.


Ready! Aim! Fire!!

I resolve to eat more fiber (but only if it’s covered in chocolate).

I resolve to take the dogs for a walk every day (to the mailbox and back).

I resolve to use up all the leftovers (especially the fudge and peanut brittle).

I resolve to make every day a special occasion.

I resolve to drink a glass of wine only on special occasions.

I resolve to conserve energy (by sleeping late).

I resolve to keep my house cleaner (and I’ll show Rod just how to do that).

Resolution, schmezolution! Whoever thought that New Year’s thing up?? Let’s shoot ‘um!

BE SURE TO TURN THE SOUND DOWN ON MY GROOVESHARK PLAYLIST BEFORE YOU START THE VIDEO!
The volume control is on the right side of the title of the song playing.

The After Christmas Special

Emaline entertains us with a little music on Christmas Eve!!



Santa came! And it's only 6 a.m.!!



What's all this stuff?? Where's MINE???



We're off to the golf course to chase some rabbits!!



Arizona-Sonoran Desert Museum on the day after Christmas!


The Rogue Speaks:

It's time once again for Jenny's Alphabe-Thursday, and Jenny has given us free rein to write something quasi-seasonal if we desire. Every year, I write my BFA a Christmas poem, so I thought I would write one for this week after Christmas (well almost!)as a post for my blog. Joey and Aimee and the twins left on Tuesday to fly back to Kentucky, and we were left all alone with only the memories of our sweet little grandchildren. Now don't get the wrong idea about my attempts at poetry. I have actually, in the past, written some serious stuff, but right now I only want to get a little goofy, so I won't miss my grandbabies so much.

Well, Christmas is over
And all through the house
The doggies are silent—
There’s nothing to grouse
About little kids screaming
And taking their toys
To throw down the hallway
As one of their joys.
The ornaments lay
In their storage container
Then back to the attic.
Well, that’s a no-brainer!
The tree is dismantled
And back in its box.
Rod left out the stockings,
Those old Christmas socks.
The good plates and silver
Are stored in their place,
The dining room buffet,
And the big storage case.
The food was delicious,
But now there are bowls
In each cubic inch that
My freezer can hold.
The house is so quiet,
No cute little tots
To snuggle and read to,
And giving us lots
Of sweet baby kisses,
And sweet baby smiles.
We must be content with
Our big photo files
Of Christmas this year
And the joy that it brought
To make our hearts warmer
And that’s just what it ought
To do at this season
Of joy and of cheer.
Yes, the house is still standing,
SO LET’S HAVE A BEER!!

Actually Rod doesn't drink (gastric reflux--alcohol burns!), and I only drink a very occasional very COLD beer in the heat of the summer. I much prefer wine! But it rhymed, and that's what I was after to close my poem out on a humerous note.

Click here to see the kids and their parents Leaving Arizona:

It is a very short clip--just like the length of their visit here!!

I'm off now to read the other entries!

THE ROGUE'S CAR TRIP

The Rogue Speaks:

A Saturday Centus on Christmas Eve? Yeah, like we're just lying around waiting for Santa to come. Well, I do need to get off my feet for a while, so why not? The prompt is in bold type.

Following Rod is like following squirrels. I just never know!! I am driving along, thinking about all the times he has blithely missed a turn. And he had the unmitigated gall to ask me if I knew how to get to the airport!!! Up ahead, I see the exit(?) for Sky Harbor. My goal, keep Rod in sight. No!!Rod, no!!!! TOO LATE! I am cursing! He is oblivious!! Still behind him, I honk the horn!!! Ah! Now he gets it! WRONG EXIT!! He gets off, gets back on, and I am furious!! Once again he has gone into a fugue state behind the wheel and missed a turn. I am screaming profanities at him. And to top it off, the flight is early!! He speeds away! Finally I reach the arrivals! He is no where to be found!! I call him on the cell. The anger in my voice is unmistakable. "Sorry," he says. Up ahead I see parents and children at the curb. I pull in. I heard an angel voice through the chaos and the noise--"Granmommy!!" Christmas has begun!

The Rogue's Christmas Letter

Does not remotely resemble our house at Christmas!!


The Rogue Speaks:

Dear Friends and Family, It is time again for our annual Christmas letter. A lot of exciting things have happened this year, beginning with the marriage of our step-niece, Irma, to Bud Tugly. Poor Irma still can’t find a job! It’s a good thing that Bud is such an entrepreneur! First he went out and got a license for $15 from PreachersAreUs.com, and then he came up with a very clever idea to make money and stay on the road so he didn’t have to listen to Irma whining about her job status. His wedding chapel on wheels is very popular, and Bud’s raking in money hand over fist! He rolls into towns and sets up outside the local bars just before closing. The he gets out his loudspeaker and starts trolling! Some men will do anything when they’re liquored up! As you know, Rod takes our dog children on a walk every day, but one day, when he was not paying attention, Little Liz got herself in some serious trouble. She was caught by the Oro Valley police dealing dope to folks she met along the way. Rod swears he had no idea what she was up to, and fortunately, Officer Friendly believed him. Liz is now wearing an ankle bracelet until her court date. Joey, Aimee, and the twins are coming to spend Christmas with us, and Rod is in charge of decorating the house and the tree. He couldn’t find the crèche and the Italian figures that I spent an arm and a leg for over 20 years ago, so I had to get a little creative and fashion one from stuff I had on hand. Since it is loaded with salt and preservatives, we can always snack on it after the family goes home. I got the idea from my friend, Jenny Matlock, creator of Alphabe-Thursday. She always makes such neat stuff!! We just got word today that a few distant relatives on my mother's side of the family are on their way here to Tucson for Christmas. I know that charity begins at home, but my home is just not big enough to accomodate these folks. I haven't even seen or heard from them for years, and I'm wondering just how they knew where we were. When we moved from Memphis, we only left an 800 number for family just so relatives couldn't hunt us down. Here's the last photo I took of them. I don't think they have ever been any farther than the Georgia/Alabama state line, and Rod thinks they just might get lost and end up in Mexico. Rod was a big hit with the neighborhood kids when he dressed up as Santa with his little helper. I'm thinking that the twins are still a little young for this sight, so I made him return the suit. The little helper hat was mysteriously ripped to shreds after this photo was taken. No one would confess, but I did notice some tiny teeth marks in what was left of it. Before I sign off, here is a little audio to get you in the Christmas spirit. Before you listen, please go to my playlist on my right sidebar, and turn down the volume for the music. It's on the right where those little bars are!!



I know this isn't my usual borderline insane Christmas letter. I think I really needed a bottle of Bailey's and a straw, but with the state of the economy right now, it's just a little too pricey!

xoxo,
Judie


P.S I almost forgot! Our son, Joey had one of his short stories published, and I'd love for you to read it. It's called "Anoint Your Engine for a Heavenly Ride." Just click on the title, and enjoy! Let me know what you think!!

p.p.s O.k! That link doesn't seem to work all the time! So the website is Ferocious Quarterly Short Works and my son's name is Joseph Mau. Check it out and report back!!

The Rogue's Centus

The Rogue Speaks:


"Oh my God, Richard!!! What on earth possessed you?"

"Well, honey, you told me to get a tree, and start decorating. The tree lots were all closed, and it's freezing in the attic where the ornaments are stored. I thought you'd appreciate my creativity!"

"That food was for the party!!!"


Hmmm--it seems I'm not the only one who's getting a little strange this time of the year! Jenny's Saturday Centus for this week seems a little out of character for the Jenny we know and love. But do we really know her? Maybe not!!

My take on the prompt came directly from the fact that Rod does the tree. I want nothing to do with it. For more years than I care to remember, I had a dream of my little family gathering around the tree with a cup of hot cocoa, listening to Christmas music, and helping me place the ornaments on the tree. NOT! I always ended up doing it myself, then having to undress it by myself in January. So, several years ago I announced that I was through! Whoever wanted the tree up was going to have to do it themselves. Of course, that meant Rod. I am not a Christmas person.

Cesar FRANCK

"Sewing Virgin Mary and Angels" - Guido Reni



The Rogue Speaks:

There certainly are a lot of lessons this week for Jenny's Alphabe-Thursday, so rather than give you some long, pedantic biography to wade through, here is my offering:

The music you hear was written by Cesar Franck (1822-1890)who spent his adult life in Paris as an organist and music teacher, as well as a composer.



It is being sung by soprano Kiri Te Kanawa, who has been said to have the voice of an angel.




We are all so busy right now, getting ready for Christmas, that sometimes we forget to take a little time for ourselves. Just sit quietly for a few minutes and give your spirit a chance to renew.

IT IS WHAT IT IS

The Rogue Speaks:

Jenny really did it to me with this Saturday Centus prompt. I must have stared at it off and on for a good thirty minutes. Nothing came to mind except the truth about Christmas for me. I used to love the season, and I prided myself in picking out just the right gift for each person. They were not expensive gifts, but I wrapped them with creativity. One year, when I was particularly broke, an immediate family member insisted that I absolutely had to buy gifts for everyone, and convinced me to use a credit card to do so. That was my first mistake--listening to a person who had never had my best interest at heart. It was down hill from then on.

Just when I thought things might get better, something else happened, and the downward spiral continued to where it is today.

So here is my offering for this week's Centus. Now don't get all sad and try to comfort me about this. I am sure I am not the only person who feels this way about a holiday that is supposed to be Christian, but has lost that spirit over the years. It is what it is:

I am sad this time of the year. I am not a Christmas person. I used to be. When my children were little, I tried to make Christmas happy, exciting. Our tree, the one with its bare side against the wall, the one marked half-price two days before, drooped with handmade ornaments. Stockings were stuffed with nuts and oranges, and little trinkets. Each child had four gifts--one big and three little. Spread out, it looked like more.

Then something happened, and all the joy left. It doesn't have to be that way, but it is.

E is for EXECRABLE

The Rogue Speaks:

This was supposed to be my "D" post until I changed horses in mid-stream.

So for Jenny's Alphabe-Thursday this week, I am letting you know exactly how I feel about the dumbing down of America by reality t.v. shows. In my last week's post, I mentioned "Lady Hoggers," those low-class skanks who chase hogs through the woods while wearing tight shirts and hoop earrings. In a recent episode, these two chase a wild boar who is running rampant through an trailer park. Who in God's name came up with the idea for this show? And just who watches it???


A Star is Born!


And speaking of hogs, the sight of men covered head to toe with tats, wearing greasy bandanas on their heads like throw-backs to the Woodstock age, and sporting those muscle shirts, and working on their motorcycles, are starting to give the open road, wind blowing through your hair while bucolic scenery speeds by, a bad name. The name Jesse James comes to mind, since he was part of that show. What a creep! He had a pretty good thing going with Sandra Bullock, but he had to screw it up. Now he says he misses his pals on the tasteless bike show, and he's sorry he left. I think he is just sorry, period, and so is that show!


Be Still My Heart!


Just who are those Kardashians anyway? Their only claim to fame is that their father defended O.J. Simpson and GOT HIM OFF!!! Rod was curious about that show, which I have NEVER seen, and after five minutes he went back to the history channel.


Who ARE These People Anyway???


I grew up in Atlanta, was married there and had children there. I was an Atlanta housewife, a REAL one. I did watch this show for about 10 minutes once, and realized that these were definitely not the genteel southern women I used to know when I lived there. These are women are obsessed with themselves and conspicuous consumption. I was totally disgusted.


White Trash

Then there's Gene Simmons and his Family Jewels. WHO CARES?????

The Dog--Best Man or Maid of Honor??



Joan and Melissa? Puleeze! Give me a break! Enough said.

Only the dumbest of the dumb finds anything of social value in "World's Dumbest Criminals."

As for those court shows, like "Divorce Court," ditto.

"Tori and Dean" are on my list, as is "Bait Car."

So, tell me--just what t.v. shows do you think belongs on this list? I have purposely left some off the list, and want to see what YOU come up with!

Silent Gaze

Judie, at 16


The Rogue Speaks:

Hmmm--this could be Wordless Wednesday instead of Saturday Centus, because I really have nothing to say about being 16. I think the expression on my face in the photo above says it all. I hope you will visit Jenny Matlock, and read the other offerings for her brilliant sixteen word prompt!!

"D" is for DID You Think I Forgot??

The Rogue Speaks:

This is a busy time of year for artists here in Tucson, with a lot of festivals and exhibitions going on, and I have sort of lost track of the days, but it would take an awful lot for me to forget Jenny's Alphabe-Thursday!!

All week I have been planning to write about the DUMB t.v. shows that I have come across when I have had a bout of insomnia--shows like "Lady Hoggers" where two women dress up in tight jeans, sexy shirts, and hoop earrings to chase wild boars through the woods. The operative word here is definitely NOT "lady." There are a lot more of these "dumbing down of America" shows, and I will address more of them in another post.

I changed my mind, however, when I got an email from my son entitled "Yummy." It seems that he has several video clips on YouTube. I highlighted the YouTube in yellow so you can click on the link and go straight to one of his videos of two of my beautiful grandchildren, henceforth know as "The Twins." My son's name is Joey Mau, and he has other videos listed on the right sidebar at YouTube, so check those out as well.

I had quite an exciting email from Terra at Sitting on an Oak, telling me that I had won THREE of her recently published children's books! I really wanted those books for The Twins! If you have children or grandchildren, you will want to get all of these books for them as well. Just go to Campbell Lawson(her pen name), and just below the header, the books can be found. Click on each one and read about them!!

I know this is nothing like my usual Thursday posts--it's really an olio (as opposed to oleo, which is margarine), a hodge podge, but after Holidazzle is over on Sunday night, I can get back into my blogging mode. Too bad you can't be here to come to the reception tomorrow night at the Hilton, in the Johsua Room. It looks pretty darned good in there! Lots of fine art and fine crafts! A Christmas shopper's delight. I'll have photos on Sunday!

Now go check out the other students' homework at Jenny's blog!!